Reflections on a Costco Run

December 28th, 2004
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Like thousands of Americans across uh… America, I shop at Costco. It’s a great place to buy bulk stuff at a cheaper price. Anyway, so I’m looking through the clothes section because 1) i don’t like wasting time at the mall and 2) they have good stuff at a cheaper price. So I’m looking for a pair of pajama pants because mine seem to have a big hole right near my butt (either i fart really powerfully or my dog bit on it making a small hole and then my big foot got caught on the hole…not sure). I find a great pajama pant style, and here I run into a problem I always run into when I’m at Costco looking at pants.

I am a skinny Asian. My pant waist size is typically about 28-32; I have to use a belt when I’m using 32. Rarely does Costco ever sell pants at 32. They sell pants starting at like 40. The pajama size I’m looking for is Medium. The boxes say sizes range from Medium to X-Large, but all it contains is X-Large. It’s not like I’m not trying to find my size either. I pull down box after box rummaging through all the pajama pants looking for medium. All I find besides X-Large is one pair of Large.

You know why America is obese? Because clothes people make and sell larger sizes. If you accomodate obese people, then they will think that there is nothing wrong with obese. While on the other hand, you have skinny people who can’t buy pants, who see that the only way they will be able to easily buy pants is to become obese.

If Costco were to sell only pant sizes from 28-40, people would be like, “Oh, I can’t fit these. Better lose some weight because I’m obese.” Yes, pants would still be sold, less people would be obese, and they would enjoy their pants even more.

Oh yeah, and my contacts (also from Costco) are now made of silicon. Which is really cool, because supposedly I can stay up all night with them and they won’t dry as fast as the old pairs. But, that means I’m looking at the world with eyes covered in the same stuff as fake boobies.

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